philmayfield

It’s a long time since I had a cravat and I was blackballed for having a clip-on dickie bow.

You could call it ‘The Lincolnshire Poacher’, or has that name already been taken?

I have the concrete base of an old greenhouse next to my sheds (yes I have two). I’ve been contemplating for a long time of erecting a shed which I could turn into a cosy saloon bar with padded benches and a roaring log fire. No longer would I have to go down to the local and mix with the people of the village. It’s just a pipe dream at the moment but I am interviewing for barmaids.

Wait ‘till Rog starts gourmet lunches in his shed!

When are you going to be let back into the house Rog?

I must confess I’ve never been invited to a cocktail party. Perhaps I’m just not elegant enough. Mind you, if you held a cocktail party in your shed I’d accept the invitation!

Not as rude as ‘coffee beans one hundred in Welsh then?

I drove through Lambley everyday for over 30 years and still regularly pass through. I’ve never set foot in the village though. I’m always intrigued by the garage that sells fuel at 30p more than the usual price. I’ve never seen anyone filling there!

When Lambley was a mining village, prior to Sunday opening time, the landlord used to pour a whole load of pints and stack them up on the bar ready for the lunchtime inrush!

What about the Woodlark?

I’ve not been in the Reindeer since the early ‘60’s. We used to lunch out at least once a week prior to ‘lockdown’ but haven’t got back into the habit. Eating out just doesn’t appeal to me anymore. I just have a cup of tea and, appropriately, ‘two fingers’ of Kit Kat at lunchtime. Out of interest today’s menu will be a full English breakfast, the usual light lunch and lamb chops and tiramisu for dinner, probably with a glass or two of Zinfandel. I lead a very simple life. If we hadn’t been up in Lancashire yesterday we could have gone to the Lent Lunch in the village hall and dined

Where’s the cocktail cabinet Rog?

No Ben, the Farmhouse Kitchen was at street level. The Chinese just up the road was upstairs. Sutton was quite a pleasant town back in the ‘60’s but so many Notts towns have gone down the pan. Southwell’s still OK though. If you want a good countrywear shop try Brocklehurst’s of Bakewell. They’re my Derbyshire relatives who came from Sheldon.

I’ve not been in to Sutton in Ashfield since the ‘60’s. My accountancy firm had a large building client there (J.Searson - no longer in business, they built many of the comprensive schools in Notts and a chunk of East Midlands Airport). I used to lunch in an excellent cafe, the Farmhouse Kitchen on Outram St. It was run by the Whetton’s, the same family as the famous runner. I’ve not been in to Mansfield either since Maplin Electronics closed (a great loss). I must suss out the shop on Brook St. although I’m not know for my elegant dress sense these days!

I use the EWM at Notcutts (Wheatctofts) at Edwalton. There’s a Cotton Traders there as well.

The only fishing I enjoy is sea fishing from a boat or fishing a Scottish Loch from a boat. I never want to catch anything, I just love being on a boat! Not a cruise ship I hasten to add.

We have used the infra red lamp within the family for many years, usually for shoulder and neck pain. It seems to work. A physio might be another alternative.

Have you tried a Revitive circulation booster? I bought one but haven’t yet tried it out! An infra red heat lamp might also help.

I’m a long time Tory voter but I, like so many others, have no positive leanings towards them presently. I think it’s partially due to the calibre of politicians these days. At one time MP’s were people of honour and principle but now most of them appear to be a bunch of rabble. Politics doesn’t attract the right sort of people anymore. There are better rewards to be had in commerce and industry. If they were paid more we’d just have a more expensive bunch of rabble for many years until the present lot died out.

We’ve just driven past the riverside at Fiskerton and the two hardy souls who were fishing from under their umbrellas at 11 this morning are still there. Both with two rods apiece. The river’s in full flow and rising once again.

Whilst we’re bragging about scars I’ve got one on the left cheek (of my face!) from when I rolled a car over, one on the back of my left hand from an aeroplane crash and another on my left hand from a plastics reclamation machine incident. You wouldn’t want to meet me, I’m grossly disfigured and it took many years to find someone who would marry me!

I think the majority of people would like to unseat the present government at the next election. The problem is that there’s no viable outstanding alternative. There will probably be a low turnout and Labour will come to power on a wave of apathy. They will spend the first four years of their reign on blaming the Conservatives. Watch your pension fund though. Stashed with cash and a very tempting source of funds!

The problem with Photoshop et al is that any picture can be faked. Coupled with artificial intelligence we will never be told the truth. It's all too far advanced to be stopped now.

Our school badge, beneath a picture of a centaur, said ‘Tenax Propositi’. Tenacious purpose. All a bit vague. It changed during my time there. Previously it was the less pretentious ‘HM’.

That would be when Kath Taverner was landlady at the Bromley. A chap called Stan also lived there but we never knew what his function was!