Terms of endearment


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Been a bit on the News and in the Papers today about some words that women find 'not nice' when they are refered to by them,even 'my dear' and others such as 'babe',sweetheart,Doll,..........just wondered what we on here don't like ? could apply to men as well.

                   Obviously (I think) Duck would be one many of us use here in Nottingham,although my wife is a Southerner she mostly refers to me as duck having lived up here that long..........what do you call your nearest and dearest or even strangers ?

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#1

 

I call them by their names. Hate being addressed as darlin', sweetheart, flower, pet, luvvie etc! At times, I've been called Jilly, which I also dislike. My father always called me Liz. Don't know why. Perhaps it was short for Lizzie Dripping but my middle name is Elizabeth, so it could have been that.

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The one I had unintentional trouble with is referring to anyone female as "woman" or "lady".

 

Normally I always use 'lady' because I always thought it sounded better and seems pleasanter than 'woman' which, to me, sounds a bit harsh and rough.

 

But one 'woman' once told me that she didn't particularly like being referred to as 'lady' because she thought it had connections with ladies of the street and ladies of the night; she preferred to be referred to as a 'woman', which I'd always avoided because I thought they'd prefer the other.

 

You just can't win.

 

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31 minutes ago, benjamin1945 said:

could apply to men as well.

 

 

Being called 'dude' never sits well with me, and if you ever 'high fived' me you'd be hanging there looking stupid forever. 

When out with Mrs Red 'what can I get you guys' don't sit well with me, I get the look from Mrs Red 'leave it, leave it' I'm thinking uppercut uppercut uppercut! 

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I'm with you Cliff-ton on the 'woman/Lady' thing..........i'm in favour of Lady,.........I do some 'meet/greet work and I welcome groups of Ladies,one group I see regular are Indian and always welcomed them with 'hello Ladies'........they are all Nottingham ladies,so the other week I tried 'ay-up me ducks'..........they all laughed and liked it...........they liked even more when they were leaving and I bid them 'sandi-pum'............which I 'd quietly asked someone for their word for tat'ta (Tamil)

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My women friends seem to prefer women or woman...........they do not like "Ladies" and my wife gets irritable when referred to as "Good Lady Wife".

Me? I use "You" and it seems to work most of the time.

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A Londoner friend of mine always introduces his wife as 'and this is the Tart'.......she don't bat an Essex eyebrow,.........don't think the Nottinham Ladies would like it though,......it is funny the way he says it........then theres an old schoolmate of mine who lives on Old Bestwood and has always hated being called 'Duck'...............................ive told him many times 'don't be so touchy Donold'

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Dream ? I wouldn't dare  !...........but to him and many 'Geezers' its a 'term of endearment'..........he'll even shout to his mate down the bar 'you and the tart wanna drink mite'........does a good rendition of 'Any old iron' as well................lol.

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Northern men have a habit of saying " the wife " as in the wifes over there/the wifes in the house I think they can not remember her name.    Hubby being a Nottingham man always refers to me by name, proper gent.

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Thread just goes to show there is no right or wrong term of address.  Also that there are those both male and female who will lay traps and enjoy springing them when the opportunity arises.

 

I always describe 'Er Indoors' as 'Mrs Col', or Mrs whatever on forums because she is not involved in the discussion and few have met her.

 

Generally, I find that avoiding the more obviously thoughtless terms has served me well, but there does always seem to be an element of damage limitation.

 

Col ( Mr, Sir, Your Eminence etc., will suffice..  :) )

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2 hours ago, Gem said:

Northern men have a habit of saying " the wife " as in the wifes over there/the wifes in the house I think they can not remember her name.    Hubby being a Nottingham man always refers to me by name, proper gent.

 

How does he feel about being reduced to 'Hubby' ?  :)

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I can't abide the terms "Hun" or "Chic".  If introducing my good lady I will say "this is my wife J** "

 

My term of endearment to her is "luv" normally.

 

But she answers to many names such as "the Boss"

"the one who shall be obeyed" and a few more in a similar vein :rolleyes: or just plain old J**

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Loved all the terms of endearment used by you all. I have a sense of correctism unless I've been introduced to someone by their shortened name I always call them by their correct name. It doesn't feel right to me me to call them anything else. Even my son and daughter names I never shortened. I call my husband by the name he introduced himself to me because his name was unusual to me and it didn't seem quite right how I pronounced it. He calls me Ci ( pronounced Chee) don't ask why because I don't know. Its just an affectionate term. Much better than some mothers call their children " PULCE" which means flea. :mellow:

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Me, my Bother, Dad, Grandad, have always been referred to by our surname name with added ie or y on the end, the only time it shocked me was at a school parents evening when a teacher used it when referring to my daughter.

 

I have had people I've known for years ask me what my first name is, I also could name the few people that only ever call me by my full first name, some of my top managers used my nickname which I always found strange?

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I'm with banjo48 on this one.    #14.

 

I'm not sure if Mrs Loppy knows she's married to  Loppylugs.  I don't think she reads NS and I don't encouage it.  A guy's got to have a bit of privacy to share his Nottingham thoughts.

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Here in the far north men are often referred to as "Mannies".  A firend who lives down in the village is Irish.  Me and SWMBO (She hates that) refer to him as "Mannie Ireland."  I simply call her "Missis".

 

My ex used to call me "Simby-bimby" and I called her "Woggit" after her school nickname "Wogger Walker".  It's odd how nicknames and terms of endearment occur and stick.

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I often call my daughters 'Kid', though they are now 31 and 36. 

What they call me is best not reported. ;)

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I worked for a while in Leeds in the 1970s and never got used to everyone calling each other 'luv' - not just friends, but work colleagues, people you met in a shop etc.

 

In the 'she who must be obeyed' genre of endearment I heard a bloke turning round to look for his other half and muttering 'I seem to have been temporarily detached from the command module'

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Things are similar here but the language is formal or informal. Informal for friends and family and formal for politeness. Whenever my husband hears someone he doesn't know call him in an informal way it irritates him and asks if the person knows him as he doesn't know them. It doesnt bother me  as in England even the queen is informal  so to speak. I answer to formal and informal, but I do think its nice being extra polite using the formal way.

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Things are pretty informal down here in the South.  It's not uncommon for a waitress to call you 'hon' or 'sweetie'.  I was surprised at first but now I don't think much of it.  I get much more irritated when they refer to us as 'guys'. As I know others on here do.

 

Had a funny experience at the Grayound bus station snackbar when I first came down here.  The black counterman said to me 'watyuwant.'  I said a hot dog please.  He followed up with wahtyouwant?  This followed on several times.  He sounded like he was mad at me. LOL.  Finally he said 'wheryufrom?'  I replied, 'Canada'.  So he said, 'Thats why you talk funny.'  After that he treated me like a long lost buddy.  I now realize a lot of folks talk like that here.  It seems offensive at first but you get used to it once you realize they are just being friendly.

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