philmayfield 4,353 Posted August 18, 2019 Report Share Posted August 18, 2019 Willy Neverlearn? 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Oztalgian 2,304 Posted August 18, 2019 Report Share Posted August 18, 2019 Phil, Some other puns from the site are :- "So he went off half-cocked?" -J.Petry "After this he will be definitely shooting blanks." -I.Titi "His barrel was shortened that day." -A.Yuan "Friends call him 'snubnose' now." "He's not half the man he used to be." -D.Webb "Clean up on Aisle 4." -M.Miller Quote Link to post Share on other sites
philmayfield 4,353 Posted August 18, 2019 Report Share Posted August 18, 2019 ‘Appenis, appenis, the only gift I don’t posess. (With thanks to Ken Dodd!) 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
katyjay 4,564 Posted August 18, 2019 Report Share Posted August 18, 2019 Just to clarify, we're not all eejits in Arizona! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nonnaB 4,172 Posted August 18, 2019 Report Share Posted August 18, 2019 Kath every country has one Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Deepdene Boy 617 Posted August 18, 2019 Report Share Posted August 18, 2019 Yes, but he runs the USA!!! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Compo 8,664 Posted August 19, 2019 Report Share Posted August 19, 2019 Well, Mrs Compo comes back today. I've had a wonderful week of peace and quiet on my own - it's been great but whatever you do don't tell her! Over the course of the week I have managed to trim all the hedges, all the grass, prune a big scyamore tree, sow poppies iin the local hedgerows, collect Parasol mushrooms in the local woods, remove part of a knuckle witih the petrol powered hedge cutter and almost break my shin whilst stamping on the stepladder to make it secure in the ground (I missed and shinned it into the ground). I've enjoyed a few pints in 'Spoons, organized a new sim for my phone, vacuumed and done the washing and shopping. I have also made an internal reducer for my home-made Pullman style bread tin, Got stuck on the sit-on mower by reversing into a fence and jamming my steel toecapped welly between fence and mower pedal and repaired the fuel lines on the peetrol hedge cutter. All-in-all a pleasant week. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
sue B 48 1,224 Posted August 19, 2019 Report Share Posted August 19, 2019 Very busy week Compo but by the sound of it I think you need supervising. LOL Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Compo 8,664 Posted August 19, 2019 Report Share Posted August 19, 2019 You could be right there, Sue! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
loppylugs 8,183 Posted August 22, 2019 Report Share Posted August 22, 2019 Back to the doc's this afternoon for a different blood pressure med. Hopefully the new one will have less side effects than the previous ones. 1 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Brew 4,215 Posted August 22, 2019 Report Share Posted August 22, 2019 Fingers crossed LL.. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jill Sparrow 8,547 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 The right one can take some tracking down, Loppy, but you'll sniff it out. You have lots of dogged determination! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DJ360 5,542 Posted August 23, 2019 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 Only about 50% cloud here and it's actually warm when cloudy and warmer again when the Sun pops out. First time for what seems like months. I suppose you lot in the East Migglunds 'rain shadow' will all be basking in unbroken sunshine. ... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jonab 1,639 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 The weather's a bit naff here. Only 24 deg and it's been raining on and off. It seems that the UK weather is much better than here for today and for the whole weekend. I'm not tempted to come over, though. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
philmayfield 4,353 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 Very warm and sunny here. We came over on your side on Monday but as soon as we crossed the Pennines the gloom hung over Manchester. I was supposed to be a passenger in my son's light aircraft trial flight out of Blackpool but it was called off. We did get fish and chips though and the flight has been rescheduled for the week after next. How you lot put up with all that rain day after day I just don't know! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
carni 9,826 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 Sitting in the sun, suppin' tea here in the West Migglunds. Might do a bit of 'Basking' in a bit, if this beautiful blue sky hangs around for a bit longer. Oh what a life. Just love this retirement thingy. Enjoy the day where ever you all are. 9 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
carni 9,826 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 I finished my tea and laid back in my recliner to drift off into oblivion. What a lovely day. Suddenly I felt a tickle on my arm and without looking, I just brushed the insect off. Back to oblivion, aaaah. Felt another tickle on my face. This time I looked and saw a flying ant. That's OK, one or two ants don't scare me. Feeling quite itchy by now, particularly on my legs and a little thought popped into my thoughts..........OH NO, Flying Ant Day. I'm covered in them. The lawn is alive. The lawn is like a 'Silver coloured life force of its own'. That's the end of my 'Basking' before it even began. Oh Hum! Has any one else got them today? 2 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
loppylugs 8,183 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 Over here they call them Termites and they will eat your house if they get to the woodwork. New houses are sprayed before the sheetrock goes on. You have bait stations around the yard to kill 'em off. Have to keep all that current if you ever hope to sell your house. In the 90s again here. It's been that way for twenty days straight. I did my shopping and filled my tank. Now I'm staying in my air conditioned doghouse for the rest of the day. Rain is forecast this weekend. Sure hope so. I've about given up on my garden. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
carni 9,826 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 Oh LL, I'm a fair skinned Blondie. I don't think I would survive in that heat. 'English Rose' I like to think. Husband says he will agree with the English part. He will suffer. Hope you get your rain fall at the weekend and I your garden soon bounces back to life. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Beekay 2,904 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 If ya'all are fed up with the gloom Norf of the Migglunds I can always use help Dahn Sarf, at Sheffield park & garden, over the bank holiday. Allus can use extra help wiv the tourists. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ayupmeducks 1,686 Posted August 23, 2019 Report Share Posted August 23, 2019 Dave, ALL ants swarm from piss ants to carpenter ants and all in between. I think Carpenter Ants are far more destructive than termites, probably because the ants are adults and huge at side of termites, 3/8" average size to almost 1/2". Termites are just small "ants". 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
loppylugs 8,183 Posted August 24, 2019 Report Share Posted August 24, 2019 I'm with you on that, John. Just seems like everybody here makes the biggest noise about Termites. From insurance companys to pest control companys seem to get really upset about them. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
HSR 248 Posted August 24, 2019 Report Share Posted August 24, 2019 DJ360..I am not a Hi-fi buff, but have often wondered about using two DAC's, one, is built into my amp, with optical input and unlikely to have true bypass ,if such a thing exists at all, when it comes to Hi-Fi..thinking guitar pedals. Amp was in the £300 price range..so nothing special. Using two DAC's does sound better to my ears but does, for me go against traditional principals! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Stavertongirl 1,463 Posted August 24, 2019 Report Share Posted August 24, 2019 After a spiderless few weeks I came home tonight after a pleasant couple of hours at the local pub to find a humganeous (spelling?) monster on my living room wall. Thought it was Brock from my side store room but he has been sticking to the rules of his tenancy just coming out occasionally to say hello. This one was even bigger, perhaps his dad looking for him? With trepidation I went to get my trusty spider catching kit (minus the brush this time) and got back into the room and with horror saw it disappearing behind my sofa. No way was I going to sit on my sofa with that monster lurking behind me. So I sat in my chair (back to the window) with my boys for protection at my feet. Waited for a while but it did not emerge. Then I came up with a plan. I would put a podcast on Alexa (she is starting to do as I ask recently) and do some knitting so it will think I have forgotten about it. After about an hour I saw it come out quite brazenly as if it owned the place. In one swift movement (that any ninja would have been proud of) I jumped over my boys and got my plastic container over it on the wall. So there we were eyeball to eyeball and it just sat there glaring at me, this isn’t supposed to happen it should be scared and obligingly fall into my container not just sit there. What is it with Nottingham spiders they certainly have attitude. So I gently moved the container and it just sat there clinging to the wall, so I jiggled it about a bit and then a bit more but the flipping thing was just being uncooperative and just sat there. It was almost saying do your worst I am up for it. So I juggled it aggressively and it finally conceded and fell into the container. I held it up and looked at it but then realised it was trying to climb out so I ran through the house, I had left the lid in the kitchen, and one very unhappy spider now resides in my neighbours garden. 6 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Brew 4,215 Posted August 25, 2019 Report Share Posted August 25, 2019 What is it with females and spiders? I was busy earlier defending the world from the forces of darkness and evil when a shriek told me my services as chief spider eviction agent was required downstairs. Open the door, gently cup you hand over him and he obligingly climbs on so you can let him out, simples! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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