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If not asking for trouble it was certainly encouraging it.   All this nonsense is getting on my nerves and when was a man touching a woman’s knee in a friendly way classed as sexual harassment.  

The genuine incidences of abuse are shocking and the perpetrators need to learn that such is not only unacceptable.  In many cases it is criminal.   Having said that and in reading between t

i agree Ann.........older men are far worse than youngsters today...........where i work a bit there is a fitness gym.....and ive noticed the younger men just get on with their fitness work..........w

1 hour ago, radfordred said:

now wants to high five me which I refused

 

Been better if it were a "Bunch of fives"RR

 

Rog

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1 hour ago, FLY2 said:

Maybe it was the boob tube and skimpy hot pants and knee length white patent boots you were wearing RR !

Fly i know this should be in another thread what you wouldn't wear now, mine is the same as quoted "what must i have looked like".

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I've kept quiet on this subject up to now, but here's my two penn'worth...

I agree that SOME of these sexual harassment/abuse cases that are in the media seem a bit trivial but I think it depends on who was doing it.  When someone in power, or someone who has 'influence' in some sphere is the one who is taking advantage by doing the touching (or worse) then It's certainly wrong.  

Among 'equals' , people's particular views on what is, or is not, considered acceptable behaviour is probably very different and so this remains a tricky subject.  

Like Lizzie and others who have posted on here, there have been times in my life when I've had to be assertive to stop certain behaviour towards me which I found unacceptable, but it's not easy to do without appearing stupid or rude.  

I am pleased that many children nowadays are being taught at an early age that it's THEIR body and they don't have to be kissed or hugged by anyone if they don't want it - this includes relatives!  I can remember as a small child when aunties and uncles used to pick me up and kiss me.  .... I felt helpless and I hated it!

I know that some of you on here don't like 'high fives' but it can be helpful to use with children who don't want hugs.

I expect this debate will keep rumbling on for a long time - in the media if not necessarily on here - so we're just going to have to read/listen to it, I suppose.....

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12 minutes ago, philmayfield said:

Would you give me an air kiss if I came to a meet up Margie?:)

 

Thought you'd never ask, Phil!   (yes, of course!)

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I worked in a predominantly female environment for the last 30 years of my working life.. and very nice it was too..  I don't think I upset anybody on the 'touching' front even though for many years my professional 'partner' was a stunningly beautiful younger lady who I don't mind admitting I had a massive crush on.  She was.. and still is utterly gorgeous, as well as a genuinely nice and intelligent colleague.  I don't recall ever so much as touching her on the arm, but I do recall feeling lucky to work alongside her. 

 

However.. about 15 years prior to that, in a different office,  I was on a night out from work and we were all in a Chinese Restaurant in St Helens.  On the way to or from the loo, or the bar or somewhere, one of the younger female staff who was always a bit 'independent' in her ways stopped to exchange pleasantries with me.  We were standing between tables in the centre of the restaurant and suddenly said young lady grasped me firmly by the buttock.  In that particular situation, with that particular young lady, my response was to do likewise.  So, we stood facing each other for a good few seconds firmly grasping each other's buttocks, before ending our little chat and moving on.  However whilst the 'grasping' was going on, several older female colleagues looked on in shock, amazement and horror.  I never knew quite how they saw this incident or whether they saw it as a joint effort, or a 'perpetrator/victim' thing and if so.. which was which?  As far as I know the incident was never mentioned again, but it does kind of point up the complexity of this stuff.

 

:)

 

 

Col

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10 hours ago, plantfit said:

Very European I think RR, what happened to the good old British hand shake?

 

Rog

It's over here in GA, Rog.  These good ole boys ud shoot you before they'd hug you.  :biggrin:

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2 hours ago, DJ360 said:

I worked in a predominantly female environment for the last 30 years of my working life.. and very nice it was too..  I don't think I upset anybody on the 'touching' front even though for many years my professional 'partner' was a stunningly beautiful younger lady who I don't mind admitting I had a massive crush on.  She was.. and still is utterly gorgeous, as well as a genuinely nice and intelligent colleague.  I don't recall ever so much as touching her on the arm, but I do recall feeling lucky to work alongside her. 

 

However.. about 15 years prior to that, in a different office,  I was on a night out from work and we were all in a Chinese Restaurant in St Helens.  On the way to or from the loo, or the bar or somewhere, one of the younger female staff who was always a bit 'independent' in her ways stopped to exchange pleasantries with me.  We were standing between tables in the centre of the restaurant and suddenly said young lady grasped me firmly by the buttock.  In that particular situation, with that particular young lady, my response was to do likewise.  So, we stood facing each other for a good few seconds firmly grasping each other's buttocks, before ending our little chat and moving on.  However whilst the 'grasping' was going on, several older female colleagues looked on in shock, amazement and horror.  I never knew quite how they saw this incident or whether they saw it as a joint effort, or a 'perpetrator/victim' thing and if so.. which was which?  As far as I know the incident was never mentioned again, but it does kind of point up the complexity of this stuff.

 

:)

 

 

Col

Thank yer lucky stars Mrs Col wasn.t about !

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The genuine incidences of abuse are shocking and the perpetrators need to learn that such is not only unacceptable.  In many cases it is criminal.

 

Having said that and in reading between the lines of today's papers what I see is a determined effort on the part of some to divide our respective countries.  Man against woman, political views against political views, white against colored, young against old, road rage driver against driver.  The list goes on and on and on. There seems to be a ton of internal strife while our world as a whole is in a nosedive.

 

Just this morning I read an item about questions that should not be asked in a job interview.  They might be seen as 'discriminatory'. None of the questions would have bothered me.  Good grief!  We are reaching the point where our very words are likely to get us into trouble in the most innocent set of circumstances.  If I buy a packet of Kellogs corn flakes I have discriminated against all the other makers of corn flakes.  To society as a whole (not to my friends here at NS) I would say  Gerroverit!  

 

It's time to stop the insanity before we all go bonkers and tear ourselves to bits.  Who benefits from that?

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At one time i was part of a team of 'Store Detectives'      eleven women and me......i was sexually harassed every day...........loved it.                   

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Part of the training for young appros at EMGAS was 'words of wisdom' reference the bored housewife situation. Very necessary as in those days we really were naïve.

 

It consisted of get your job done, make an excuse you have to be somewhere else, promise to come back later, get out of there, immediately report to your foreman and DON'T go back.

 

One young lad of 18 had just got his tools, he was some sort of born again Christian and very religious, one day a woman came on to him with the top buttons of her blouse undone. Instead of following the advice he told her exactly what he thought of her, her reaction was to rip open her blouse and scream, all the gaffers knew him and stood by him but it some months to sort out.

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Only one thing to do in those situations.  Gerrout!!! fast.  And yes we were naive NBL.  Only by the grace of God some of us didn't get into some dangerous situations.

 

It's been the same for thousands of years.  Read the story of Joseph and Potiphar's wife.  Genesis 39.  She kept after him.  Finally he ran and she tore his coat off him.  He went to jail for a while as a result.

 

During my pastoral ministry years I would NEVER counsel a woman alone.  Attachments can happen very quickly.  I always took my wife with me.  Your position is finished if there is even a hint of monkey business.

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Oh dear, my mind is in utter turmoil, and my conscience is in overdrive. When I was at FFGS around 60-61, a girl called Suzanne used to sit in front of me, and I was fascinated by her long blonde ponytail. I'd lose concentration on the lesson, and twiddle with the bottom of her ponytail, and I'm desperately worried that this might come under the heading Sexual Harassment. However, I can't recollect her ever telling me off at anytime. Anyway I may consider suing her for causing me to fail all my O levels ! Phew.

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On ‎04‎/‎11‎/‎2017 at 10:50 AM, philmayfield said:

Does this behaviour go on at Nostalgia meet-ups or is it just the Mwah, Mwah kissing on both cheeks. Obviously just with members of opposite sexes. With this touchy feely stuff going on at the moment I’m sure it’s not all instigated by the men. As a naive 18 year old I took a girl from Bulwell on the Caterpillar at Goose Fair and didn’t realise what had hit me! Woodthorpe girls were much better behaved.:)

 

There were only a few places to meet girls when I was growing up. For me growing up near Sycamore Rd the only girls you had a choice of you already went to school with them, so didn't want to know. Goose fair attracted all of the single girls from places you had never heard of. And they were so randy all for the cost of a ride (no pun intended). You were naïve at 18. Did you never go to the Lacarno at the age of 12? 

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Never been to the Locarno at any age. Dancehalls were not really my scene although I did make a couple of exploratory trips to The Palais. Living in the countryside from my late teens I didn’t venture much into Nottingham. Young Conservatives was the place to be back in those days. We weren’t particularly political but there were some posh girls. Still married to one!;)

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