Rhymes from our childhood


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Variations on a theme?

Happy Birthday to you,

You belong in a zoo,

You look like a monkey,

And you act like one too!

You been on the HP Eric???....... :biggrin:

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Updated twenty-eighteen    Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall  The structure of the wall was incorrect  So he got ten grand from Claims Direct 

It must be 50+ years ago since I heard that one.       That's because we are. 

It were me dad that made the fire It were me mam that made the tea It were me mam and dad that fell in love It were me mam and dad that made me It were me mam and dad that I was proud of It were

not last night but the night before

two big tom cats came to my door

i went down stairs to let them in

and they hit me on the head with the rolling pin

i went upstairs to get in bed and they thru the pickle pot over my head

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Rule Britannia, three monkeys up a tree

One fell down and hurt his little

Willie is a bulldog, basking in the sun

Down came a bumblebee and stung him on his

Arsk no questions, tell no lies

I saw a policeman buttoning up his

Flies are a nuisance, bumblebees are worse

This is the end of my dirty little verse.

We thought this so naughty as kids!

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Vaguely recall a revolting rhyme about "...a dead dog's eye, all mixed together with [something or other]..."!

Sure that someone can dot the i's and cross the t's.

Cheers

Robt P.

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Slabber dabber pudding

Green snot pie

All mixed together

In a dead dogs eye

Spread it on a sandwich

Eat it very quick

All washed down with a cup of cold sick

Usually the answer to the second sitting kids when they asked "Whats for dinner today"

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Hitler has only got one ball

Hess has got no balls at all

Himmler had something similar

But poor old Goebbals

Has no balls, at all.

Sung to the tune whistled in Bridge over the River Kwai

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Little Billy Bates was a naughty boy

A naughty boy was he

One day when he was walking

down a busy thoroughfare

He shouted It's coming It's coming

All the people started running

Asking Billy what was coming

When he told them Christmas

They clasped him like a drum

Threw him in the river

It made him shiver

He said by gum It's come

Val

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Here's another, but not if there are any more words to this one

Once a upon a time

When the birds jobbed lime

And the monkeys chewed tobacco

The little piggies ran

With their fingers up the bum

To see what was the matter

Val

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  • 2 weeks later...
My friend Billy

had a ten foot willy,

He showed it to the woman next door,

She thought it was a snake, so hit it with a rake,

And now his willy's no more

And now it's only four foot four (Regional variation)

Our (Insert name here) is a funny 'un

Got a head like a pickled onion

Got a face like a squashed tomato

And legs like two props

I use it on my kids and their mummy and they love shouting me down (great fun)

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  • 3 years later...

I went to the picture's tomorrow,I had a front seat at the back,A lady came round with some plain cake with currants in, I ate it and gave it her back, I went straight round a corner, to see a dead donkey die, I took out my knife and shot it, and sent it bow-legged in one eye.

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Hitler has only got one ball

Hess has got no balls at all

Himmler had something similar

But poor old Goebbals

Has no balls, at all.

Sung to the tune whistled in Bridge over the River Kwai The Music is: Colonel Bogey March

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Hickory dickory dock 2 mice ran up the clock, the clock struck one......................but the other one escaped by parachute......................

.I'll get me coat

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Hey diddle diddle

The cat did a tiddle

All over the dining room floor

The little dog laughed

To see such fun

So the cat did a tiddle some more

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Old mother Hubbard wen to the cupboard

To get her poor doggy a bone,

but when she bent over, up jumped Rover!!

And slipped her a bone of his own....................................

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Here's one that went with both Skipping and Two-ball:

Nebuchadnezzar the king of the Jews (double throw/double under)

Bought his wife a pair of shoes (double throw/double under)

When the shoes began to wear (double throw/double under)

Nebuchadnezzar began to swear (double throw/double under)

When the swearing began to stop (double throw/double under)

Nebuchadnezzar bought a shop (double throw/double under)

When the shop began to sell (double throw/double under)

Nebuchadnezzar......Alas, the remainder is lost to history unless someone here can throw a light upon it?.

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\snip\

Also on bonfire night or thereabouts, we sang

Bonfire night, the stars are bright

Two little angels dressed in white.

Seems a short verse, was there more?

Yes - but I can't remember it; perhaps I'm not senile enough just yet. :crazy:

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Girls' chant at boys who stared at knickers tucked into skirts for games purposes:

"Bought and paid for,

Clean and cared for,

If you don't like it,

What do you stare for?"

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