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philmayfield last won the day on September 16

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About philmayfield

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  1. Have you done as much womanising as him?
  2. There are many people complaining about the situation but the fact is that it’s a largely unprecedented situation and decisions have had to be made ‘on the hoof’. The complainers never seem to come up with a solution.
  3. The first morning at breakfast in the hotel the waitress said 'will ye no be havin' the porridge?' I replied 'is it compulsory?' There was a deadly silence!
  4. The very first time I went to Scotland was to an audit client back in the early 60's. I caught the overnight sleeper train to Edinburgh at around 11pm. from Victoria Station. Just as I managed to get to sleep they shunted it around in York. It then stopped in Galashiels at around 6am. where I looked out of the window to see a man in a kilt, so I knew we'd crossed the border. Breakfast consisted of a cup of tea and a digestive biscuit. The next stop was Edinburgh where I changed trains for the onward journey to Perth. It arrived at a civilised breakfast hour and I checked in at the North British hotel and had a full Scottish breakfast. I was collected by someone from the client's factory and did a day's work after meeting the company secretary who was in his office steaming the unfranked stamps off the envelopes from the day's post. This was Scotland remember! In the evening, after I had eaten at the hotel, I met up with a member of the firm's staff for a drink. He proceeded to try and drink me under the table so I had to keep my end up for England. Fortunately back then the bars closed dead on 10pm and a shutter was brought down. The evening drinking sessions went on for the rest of the week; beers with whisky chasers! I was glad when Friday came round so I could get home to recover. I arrived at Victoria station at some dreadfully early hour on Saturday morning and whilst I was waiting for a taxi to arrive a member of the station staff asked me where I wanted to go. When I told him Bleasby he said he would take me there for a quid so I accepted his offer. I've been to Scotland many times since. When I worked for East Coast Finance they made me the regional accountant for Scotland and I used to catch an early morning plane from EMA to Glasow and stay overnight. One morning in the office I was asked where I'd been the previous evening. I told them I went to a couple of pubs in the Gorbals. They were horrified and I was told in no uncertain terms that was an unsafe thing to do! I quite enjoyed chatting to the locals and had no problems. We still go to west coast of Scotland for holidays where we rent a cottage by the sea. We would be there now if it wasn't for the virus restrictions. I love Scotland and can't wait to get back. I would like to live there but my wife dislikes the Scots!
  5. There used to be an expression used to indicate when somewhere was very quiet. ‘It’s like Aberdeen on a flag day’. I’ve not heard it said for many years. My mother said it in front of my father’s Scottish brother in law and he was not best pleased!
  6. When I bought the bagpipes the music shop gave me a jar of brown gooey looking substance with which I was supposed to lubricate the inside of the bag to stop it leaking air. I don't know what happened to it - my wife might have spread it on my toast. They sit forlornly on the shelf in what we call the 'music room' simply because all the unused instruments seem to congregate there. Since compiling my earlier inventory I have now found a violin. I just hope no visitor ask for a recital. The last time I heard the bagpipes live was on the quayside at Oban. I asked the piper if he could play 'Far, Far Away'. Sadly he had no sense of humour as he told me to eff off.
  7. I’ve just done an instrument stocktake: Hofner Congress accosting/electric 2 Fender electrics A Yamaha 12 string acoustic/electric Folk guitar Bugle Trumpet Clarinette Bagpipes Banjo Electric bass guitar. Mouth organ I gave the keyboard to a charity It’s amazing what you collect over the years!
  8. We too have an interesting collection of musical instruments. My favourite is a set of bagpipes which I’m not allowed to play. Many years ago I had a Caterham 7 sports car and I used to take it for a thrash around the back lanes of Lincolnsire early on a Sunday morning. I was amazed to see, in a roadside clearing in the middle of nowhere, a lone piper playing his heart out. I paused to listen and played it to my wife on my mobile. He was obviously banished from his house!
  9. Failure to pay the fine could result in a sentence or more leniently community service. His copybook is already blotted.
  10. I bought a banjo after watching ‘Deliverance’. Couldn’t get as good as that guy though. Actually someone else was playing it!
  11. .....and I'm looking forward to my roast beef dinner tonight. But first a traditional full works English breakfast!
  12. I agree that there are large tracts of the earth that are unpopulated but that's because those areas don't have the infrastructure to support human life. People need a climate and conditions where they can live comfortably. In our own country there are vast unpopulated areas of Scotland but people live predominantly in the fertile lowlands. You can't grow enough food in mountains and deserts to support substantial populations.
  13. I’ve got a twelve string. A Yamaha acoustic with a pickup. It does make a unique mellow sound. Sadly after I chopped a finger off my left hand a few years ago I’m unable to play it!
  14. Overpopulation is rarely mentioned but that is at the root of most of the world's problems - and still people breed like rabbits!