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  1. 11 points
    When our pets needed to take tablets we used two spoons to crush them and sprinkle the powder on their food. Surprisingly the cats never made a fuss but Jack (the Jack Russell) was suspicious and gave the contents of his dish a thorough sniffing but ate it eventually. I posted this ages ago but can't find it now:- How to give a cat a pill. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill in mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paw. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat’s throat vigorously. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse’s forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. Retrieve cat from neighbor’s shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door on to neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap. Tie the little bastard’s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table. Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. How to Give a Dog a Pill Wrap it in bacon. Toss it in the air.
  2. 9 points
    Reflections at Amble on the Northumbrian coast.
  3. 7 points
    Another day finished at the office.
  4. 7 points
    Our road always floods when there's heavy rain as the drains can't cope, our drive slopes up from the road so house a few feet above road so safe from flooding. Moaned to Ashfield council many times but nothing ever done... Wife was staring through the lounge window during the heavy rain yesterday: I eventually let her in...
  5. 7 points
    Vic you seem to indicate that the Kenneth W Clarke in the court case mentioned above is yours . There was another report of the same case that said Kenneth was aged 26 ( in 1944) . This computes to him being born in 1918 . Moving forward to the wartime 1939 Register there was a Kenneth W Clarke , a grocery manager living on Carlton Road with a Skellington family . This register doesn't give any relationships between residents within a property and he may have just been a lodger there ? (His occupation does match the later court case.) Fortunately the Register does give a date of birth .12th Feb 1918 . I am sure you realise that given this date of birth it's likely your father may have passed on . Indeed there is a death in the registers for a Kenneth Walter Clarke in the 4th Qtr of 1987 in Truro district , quite a way further West than Bristol that you mentioned in another message . However the death record does give his date of birth as 12th Feb 1918 , matching that given in 1939. Of course this is all circumstantial , the "Kenneth W" in 1939 could have had a different middle name and the "Kenneth Walter" in 1987 could have jetted in from some other place on the planet and just happened to have the same date of birth. Sending for his death cert may give further details such as where he lived and who reported the death but there's no guarantee it's the right man . Good luck !
  6. 6 points
    What a shame Firbeck excellent photos are now broken?
  7. 5 points
    TOO DAMNED EARLY !!
  8. 5 points
    Well, I couldn't let Ben's story end on a downbeat the other day, so I've given it a happy ending. Take it away, Barry Manilow His name was Ben - Oh! He was a grocer. He'd slice your bacon with a squeeze. Slap and tickle with your cheese! "Let's see your haslet. Don't tell me husband!" Those women queued down Denman Street...and it weren't for potted meat! But when the blinds came down Our Ben would hit the town. Loafers, Levis and liberty bodice, Oh, boy did he look sweet? Shop at Marsden's, Vernon's and Farrand's. Dots, Shirleys, Pams, Lizzies and Karens He's got crackling...under the counter! Tea bags were rationed but never the passion, Down at Marsden's.......beep, beep, beep, beep... Ben fell in love! Her name was Carni. She was a looker. She came in after some cream cakes and Ben asked her for a date. "You're just a shop lad. Go mind your Hovis!" And as the tears came to Ben's eyes, Carni fingered the pork pies. "I'll let yer ride me bike." "Just go and take a hike!" She flicked her ash in his corned beef pasties..and it wrecked his life! Shop at Marsden's, Vernon's and Farrand's. Annes, Dorothys, Maudes, Janes and Sharons. No melting moments behind the freezer. "The charm isn't workin'. You call that a gherkin?" Down at Marsden's...beep, beep, beep, beep Can't win em all! Her name was Nonna, She was Italian. "I want salami by the slice and a bag of Whitworth's rice. What's with those cheekbones? You from Verona?" And as he scooped the potted meat, Ben began to feel the heat. He thought he'd grab his chance And asked her for a dance. Among the tins of Fray Bentos pies, they found a true romance! Suet puddings, tinned steak and kidneys. The women all want home deliveries! They queue for passion over the counter! Well worth raiding the coffers for Ben's 'special offers' Down at Marsden's....beep, beep, beep, beep, It's Ben they love!
  9. 4 points
    I could identify most of the locations, and I've probably seen some of the drivers. Typical day-time driving standards are definitely worse than they used to be, but there are obviously also a lot more cars on the roads. And I agree with Brew that some of the dash-cam brigade seem to think that having one fitted makes them holier than the rest. Something I do a lot these days when driving (which I never used to do) is to watch the actual road surface. You could easily wreck your tyres or suspension in some of the potholes and crevices which are all over the region. Add to that the spectacular lack of white lines (worn away) at some complex junctions, it's easy to understand why some people get genuinely confused.
  10. 4 points
    Somewhere out there, Colly, there is a parallel universe in which you remained at Chester le Street, won a place at Oxford, wrote a thesis on how to make tea and were awarded the Nobel Prize for Physics. Somewhere out there is a parallel universe in which our Ben is a Trappist monk!
  11. 4 points
    Visiting my maternal grandparents was always a special holiday. We lived in Nottingham and they lived in Barrow in Furness. Their house was bombed during the war and they ended up living in a flat above some offices. Being there meant visits to the coast, beach combing, collecting winkles and cockles, searching rock pools for baby crabs, always being careful to watch for the incoming tide. My grandfather was called Gary by all his grandchildren, don't know why maybe it was a name for grand dad in those parts. He used to go crabbing and bring all sizes of crabs back in a sack and empty them onto the kitchen floor. Then a mad scramble to get them into the boiling pot. Nana used to take me to a little herbalist on the main road to drink a glass of sass ( sasparella). On market days she would take me to the fish area and buy me a pint of shrimps which she always did when I was small and if I didn't get them would scream until they were placed in my hands. As I grew and was able to travel on my own and spend the school holidays with them Iwould visit everyone I remembered. My 2 aunties were the usual ones I visited. Irene because she had 4 boys and they were great company , Gwennie because she had a budgie who talked and how he could talk. " here comes the vicar, here comes the vicar, here comes the vicar" when he got no response he'd say " bu**er the vicar. He often used to escape but was always found mostly on Peel Island where the lighthouse keeper knew exactly who he belonged to. They were very poor but they gave me the most delicious breakfasts of broken biscuits for me pure luxury. Gary worked at the steel works and when the 12 o'clock buzzer sounded for lunch I'd never seen so many bikes all in one place. There were also the bikes belonging to the shipyard employees. From where they lived I could see the high level bridge being raised to let the ships through. If my parents took us , my brother and I, we would come back the coast road way and pick up some flukes. Don't ask what they are called but to us they were always flukes. Huge flat fish, bottom dwellers that when cleaned their gills were full of tiny pink shells. I loved this fish Many happy memories, but on revisiting Barrow with my husband quite a few years ago, it didn't seem the same. The butchers shop where my Uncle Tom worked was no longer there, the sass shop had gone too. I left there feeling quite sad as if I'd lost a little of my life.
  12. 4 points
    My love life back than was up & down like a prostitutes knickers, lol, I'd usually blow it by doing or saying sumat stupid. My mate said his girlfriends mate fancied me, I knew she was hot so went for it = it was the wrong mate, it was the munter who fancied me. I went out with her for a bit to sort of save face, she worked at a biscuit barrel factory in Kirkby & would give a me a biscuit barrel she'd nicked every time I saw her, Mam had more biscuit barrels than she knew what to do with, lol. She said she wanted to get pregnant so I legged it...
  13. 3 points
    When master and I decided to call it a day on long all travel and also just going over the channel. We decided to have a dog and holiday's in the UK, During our year's we have had many dogs, well dogs !! no only bitches it was decided that at our ages a rescue dog would be best, well we looked and looked but could not find what we wanted, we had 2 Rotties and had done trials with them many years ago and i think this was t back of our minds. One day while at Chinese brush painting the tutor had her dog with her it was a west island white, mind made up we started looking, well we found Meurig Kennels in Wales which had Westies and other dogs. Went down to pick up our Westie. Well it was in a pen with a young minature Schnauzer this Schnauzer came straight up to master and licked him, that was it we ended up with Sam a dog, we have had Sam about 7 months now and I would not swop him for anything or anybody. My only worry is age (me that is) have we done the right thing we did not intend having a puppy but HAY-HO we got Sam and he's great.
  14. 3 points
    This is what I was thinking of. Look about 19 minutes in.
  15. 2 points
    Compo we have a pellet stove and it's been caput for almost a week. Called our usual firm to come to fix it but they were unindated with work , called another firm and they were the same. The second one rang today to say one of his colleagues was in the area so he called in and found it was one of the pumps that had failed and he wasn't qualified as he was an engineer for stoves,but said for the first to bring a pump when they come tomorrow. It's cold and hasn't stopped raining for days so we are suffering with hot water from immersion heater, electric fires and a godsend of a Camino which has 3 outlets and is at present burning logs. Hope they remember to bring the pump tomorrow.
  16. 2 points
    I picked up Princes at War by Deborah Cadbury whilst in the library. A look at the archive evidence for the relationship between Edward VIII and George VI. Although before my time, David, Prince of Wales has always fascinated me and though I have read many books and articles relating to him, it is still very difficult to understand his undoubtedly damaged personality, still less that of the peculiar woman he married. Otherwise, his family comes across much as anyone else's: a collection of oddballs who are often at daggers drawn with their parents and siblings. I'm sure that applies as much to any of the members of NS as it does to the royals, with the exception that our dirty washing isn't displayed for all to see on the front pages of the media. That's what Facebook and the like is for...at least for some, who seem to revel in it.
  17. 2 points
    Rememebr it?! If you want to work for the delivery company "Yodel" it is a compulsory skill!
  18. 2 points
    There's been a lot more than the usual amount of precipitation here in the last few weeks. I say precipitation as at the height I live, it's been coming down as sleet. It doesn't last long on the ground and because of living part way up a mountain, there is not much danger of flooding. One good thing about it is that the ski resorts are getting plenty of snow for the winter tourist season. (I'm not suggesting I like the tourists but a lot of the locals work at the ski resorts in the winter when the vineyards and perfumery land are 'resting').
  19. 2 points
    AG's book came up on one of the Nottingham sites on FB today. It may sell some more copies for him.
  20. 2 points
    Wheatsheaf 1937 "New version" with new road and bridge over railway 1937, presumably rebuilt to face the new road; And the bay windowed house definitely looks to be part of the Mill (1931), new bridge not yet open;
  21. 2 points
    Not sure if I've ever posted this before. The early Wheatsheaf, the version before the one which later became McDonalds.
  22. 2 points
    That's what I'm having. DIY unfortunately, restaurants very very busy and as usual at these times short staffed. Alex stays with me as long as possible then has to dash leaving them all to finish off. So I've just put some Findus breadcrumbed cod in oven. I don't usually like this sort of thing ready frozen but I've had these before and they are quite nice so of course I'm getting a little more exercise which can't be bad.
  23. 2 points
    Well, ya know how the Yanks are. Eat everything with a fork. its only us Brits that know the proper handling of utensils.
  24. 2 points
    I also watched Love your garden, with the obsequious short arsed but much appreciated Alan Titchmarsh the other night. His gang did a tremendous job on renovating the large garden of a poor chap who contracted meningitis and sepsis in his mid 40's. He's had to have amputation treatment on all four limbs. I know that a lot of these heart wrenching stories are virtually unwatchable, but this one really hit home for some reason. Maybe it's because I love gardening so much, that I'd be devastated if for any reason I was prevented in doing so. Anyway, well done to Alan and his gang.
  25. 2 points
    Next time I'm up that way I'm gonna have a look for a well swept pavement and a tidy drive, then I'll know it's your gaff Fly. You mention the bridge at Arnold rd/Hucknall rd., I remember when I were about 11, I were in Heathfield isolation hospital with my youngest brother, John and we used to look out across to that bridge and count the number of coal wagons passing by, pulled by a steam loco. Was hospitalised for about 3 months wih Gastro- Enteritis, so had plenty of time to watch the trains. Don't know where they were heading to but hazard a guess toward Victoria station way. No doubt somebody will enlighten me. Remember as we were getting better, we were allowed out onto the grounds with a nurse who took us over to where they kept pigs so we could see the trains closer up. Amazing thing is, whenever I pass farm buildings, that rural smell always reminds me of the stay in Heathfield hospital... Odd that. Another bit of useless information.
  26. 2 points
    Had a good day today. It's 'er indoors 76th birthday so bought her a special treat. A box of liquorice novelties ! Now she can chew away at liquorice laces and pipes to her hearts content. My turn next month.
  27. 2 points
    Perhaps we ought to rewrite that one for young Trogg. Where do you go to, my hubby. When you're alone in your shed?
  28. 2 points
    The cats I help out with are all either disabled or very elderly and for that reason do not leave the rescue centre but are royally looked after for the rest of their days by people who love them. Cats Protection League have a never ending list of cats needing good homes. They'd be happy to hear from you, Ben.
  29. 1 point
    Yes they are the ones that speed, zig zag in and out of traffic and use their mobiles on instatwitface whilst driving. In many cases the P stands for Pratt. Don't know about the UK but here in OZ they must be using cheap paint on the road line markings as they all but disappear in heavy rain and I so wish they would use the old fashioned "cats eyes" instead of plastic reflectors
  30. 1 point
    I have in the past been tempted to point out the odd grammatical error, then I re read some of my own posts with missed words, repeated sentences, poor syntax and cringe...
  31. 1 point
    My son always carries a 'poachers rod' when out for a walk. Last Christmas the pike were just queuing up to be caught at the local ponds! Never happens for me.
  32. 1 point
    Songs from another time.. 1950s harmony.. I thought this stuff was 'naff' at the time.. but I've since learned different.. Rockin!!
  33. 1 point
    If you check your gps you'll find that 75 indicated is around 70. All speedos underread.
  34. 1 point
  35. 1 point
    Ah, the NAAFI. My father used to say they did their best to poison the troops. My mother was in the NAAFI from October 1944 until the end of WW2, based at Garratts Hay near Woodhouse Eaves. After her initial dismay at sleeping in a Nissen hut and being given responsibility for making the fire in the pot bellied stove, she had a good time of it and made lots of friends. They had to open the canteen in the evenings and mornings were spent getting food ready but afternoons were free time when they all went to the cinema. One good thing about NAAFI life was that they never went hungry, unlike some of her friends in the ATS who lived on bread and jam. NAAFI girls also got the pick of any makeup or toiletries delivered to the canteen for sale to troops stationed nearby. For the whole of their married life, my father always quipped, "Here she comes with her ersatz coffee!" whenever mum emerged from the kitchen with a tray! Mum thought the NAAFI uniform was drab and persuaded her brother who was in the army to get her a battle top with shiny brass buttons. She had this tailored to fit her by a local tailoress on Bobbers Mill Road. No one said anything so uniform inspections must have been fairly relaxed.
  36. 1 point
    These people should be made to watch films taken by war cameramen who where on the front line to record what they really went through and all the suffering and death all around them, but they still carried on.
  37. 1 point
    The Mint Bar was in the Albany Hotel, which is now part of the Britannia Hotel chain. In recent times it's all gone down hill a bit. https://www.nottinghampost.com/news/nottingham-news/police-issue-britannia-hotel-warning-2591253 https://www.nottinghampost.com/news/local-news/which-deems-britannia-hotels-worst-3473665
  38. 1 point
    Ciao Nonna, hope you are feeling better after your little adventure. Nice to see you back on line. Please accept my sincere regards and best wishes, Barrie.
  39. 1 point
    Brew I would love to use those , but I would miss seeing the look on her face and also risk the chance of her coming back early. I will remember them and when see is out shopping one day I will try them, there are some pleasures in being retired.
  40. 1 point
    BeeKay, T.J. Edson lived near Melton Mowbray. Met him a few times in Smiths when he was buying stationery. Always in black and wearing a stetson.
  41. 1 point
    Aaaarrrrggggg! Thanks, young Trogg. You can go off people, you know!
  42. 1 point
    Apparently, you cannot dream about strangers, only people whom you've met before even if only briefly. Interesting fact.
  43. 1 point
    A dark sucker sounds like something you'd buy from the ice cream man when I was younger.
  44. 1 point
    Easy to overlook because it's so familiar.. but 'Don't Let The Sun Catch You Crying'.. is a great set of lyrics.
  45. 1 point
    Colly you astound me with your knowledge, I try hard to understand all of this but I have to admit I haven't a clue. On the bright side I can now boast that I know of a super intelligent man from Mucky Uckna.
  46. 1 point
    Did you learn all this from that girl you were dancing with, Colly? Was her surname Einstein?
  47. 1 point
    Agree Fly.. Cliffton.. 'Dinner with Jimi' is worth a watch, DJ.. Dave Dee, i think, still owns the right's to the fantastic Beat Club footage..way superior to OGWT. Feel a calling to listen to Brian Setzer doing 'Nightingale sang' & his big band orchestra in general!
  48. 1 point
    Not sure what this was at the lights at the Wheelhouse earlier today? When I caught up with it side by side at Crown Island it had a machine gun mounted on the bonnet? Sunday drivers eh?
  49. 1 point
    In the sites I frequent.. 'Just Sayin'.. is used sort of jokingly, to indicate that you are throwing something in.. but don't want to get into a major debate about it...
  50. 1 point
    Strange how songs bring memories instantly to mind, isn't it? I've never had any interest in pop music but my sister used to watch Top of the Pops every week. I can remember Mary Hopkin appearing on that programme and singing that song while my sister was packing her suitcase for her first trip to Spain. At the time, 1968, she worked for Horizon Travel on Parliament Street, just up from where the Victoria Centre was being built. She and her best friend, Su Pollard, went to Estartit for 2 weeks. Every time I hear the song, I think of them and that holiday. She came back loaded up with loads of dark wood candlesticks for mum and dad, a black lace shawl and a wooden fan with Spanish dancers painted on it for me. Still have all of them.
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