tomlinson

Pubs with no kids inside.

Still waiting for my own equinox.

Jaqualine Pearce - Servalan - Blake 7

This could be the answer to the 777 mystery!

The wife and I were once walking by a wood where a buzzard had a nest with young, I suppose. As we walked, it followed us from tree to tree until it thought us out of range to cause interference. It was quite wierd!

Why? He hasn't done anyone any harm has he?

Numbers of buzzards are beginning to appear in Norfolk.

Seems odd to me that they suddenly tell us the aircraft turned about 180 degs off course. I reckon it's been high jacked and told to fly to East MIdlands airport!

How about sueing Scadinavia for all the raping and pillage carried out here by the Vikings and the Romans look a trifle guilty, not to mention all those northerners climbing Hadrian's Wall. The ambulance chasing solicitors should be employed to look into this!

And it was he who after a night out, banged the door of an undertaker and called, 'SHOP'!!!

It's also a fact that no one has a better reputation and is liked by so many people as when they're dead. Seems of benefit all the way round!

After a long association with the armed services and airline industry I can safely say there is nothing I haven't heard a joke or humorous remark about. Many of these quips would be considered 'sick', though here it is a matter of survival. I think humour is universal but there are those who are sensitive to that thing called 'poor taste' and this sensitivity is found in regional comfort zones.

Oh, evolution

At the old Wm Crane academy a teacher asked this question. He said the name Baker came from bakers; Smith from blacksmith and so on. He asked a lad called John Taylor what he thought his ancestors would have been, and Taylor answered, 'Gorillas'. It caused much laughter but I can't see much wrong with the answer myself.

Bit of electrics; bit o' this bit o' that, but in general, as was once pointed out to me, I've got fingers like pigs' tits!

Yes it's spring! A friend of mine ate some daffodil bulbs in mistake for onions in winter and ended up in hospital. He tells me he should be out soon.

I have to say, being a miserable git, I don't like car stickers, although the funniest I've heard of is one referring to Harold Wilson and, I think, Barbara Castle. It said, 'Barbara's Got One - Harold Is One'.

Could well be WW3 on the way. We're depleting our armed services.

On Facebook I have friends in their twenties who long for their own 'good old days' when they were young. It will never end.

In the group I'm with, we often contact each other on Facebook. One 19 year old put a message on about something we were doing and wrote, 'I'll be there and bring my muscles along'. I went on and said, 'O.K. Don't forget the cockles, vinegar and some bread and butter'. The reply was, 'What would I want to bring all that for'? This was not a joke on her part and youngsters don't seem to understand this sort of humour. I often have to explain jokes, good or bad and mine are pretty rotten, to anyone below 20 yrs old.

I reckon there should be a sliding scale for haircuts. Mine's slid off so it should be the more hair you have, the more you'll be charged.

Living near Chester, just inside the Welsh border was interesting. Travelling round Wales and working with some Welsh, I found the North Walians didn't like the South Walians and vice versa. In many cases, the Welsh didn't like anyone from England.

I remember a band led by Trevor Jones appearing once with Acker Bilk at the Albert Hall. Can't remember the name of the band though.

All of 'em! The best programmes are those recorded so they can be wound through. If watching 'live', we turn off the sound or change channels. It amazes me that they must work or advertizing would not be paid for.

You're quite right but teaching students from overseas we had to be PC about the first colour.