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Back to Squirrels :-

The Grey carries a virus harmless to us humans but harmfull to the poor Red . Grey Squirrels taste good and there fore make good eating Reds don't taste nice , so lets all go out and "Eat a Grey everyday" and wipe the little buggers out !!!

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If I weighed that much, I doubt if I could jump either! :rolleyes:

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must be a few others? hippo's rhino's etc to say nothing of seals, walrus etc

no1 Don,t let hippogirl hear you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • 3 years later...

Errm interesting

Elephants are the only animals that can't jump !

Poohbears signature puts paid to this myth

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Both 'clockwise' and anti-clockwise' Haggis have the ability to jump but refrain from doing so because having odd left or right legs makes landing a precarious business.

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According to some sources, the wild haggis's left and right legs are of different lengths allowing it to run quickly around the steep mountains and hillsides which make up its natural habitat, but only in one direction. It is further claimed that there are two varieties of haggis, one with longer left legs and the other with longer right legs. The former variety can run clockwise around a mountain (as seen from above) while the latter can run anticlockwise. The two varieties coexist peacefully but are unable to interbreed in the wild because in order for the male of one variety to mate with a female of the other, he must turn to face in the same direction as his intended mate, causing him to lose his balance before he can mount her. As a result of this difficulty, differences in leg length among the haggis population are accentuated.

800px-Haggis_scoticus.jpg

A wild haggis specimen, Haggis scotticus, as displayed in the Glasgow Kelvingrove gallery, next to a prepared example.

(With apologies to Wiki for exercising poetic licence).

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Am reminded of Ken Dodd on the Radio doing his own version of some quiz that was popular in the 1960's ? "What do you know"? at the start of the real thing the quizmaster would state a few bizarre true facts in response to repeated "what do you know" Doddy did his own version of totally OTT answers, one I recall was "Did you know, if you push a marble up the right nostril of a Maasai Warrior's nose you'll probably get the biggest hiding of your life"

Sorry to be so vague, but long time ago, also reading it back does not come across as so funny as when I heard through headphones in Forman ward of The General after a trip through a fence on a triumph,

(Before any wiseguy question's no mention was made of the probable outcome of doing it to the left nostril)

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Whilst on the subject of big cats, did you know that the Cheetah is the only cat in the world that can't retract it's claws.

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