darkazana 1,736 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 Just come off the phone to my Mum, having had a call from my brother informing me that her house has been broken into. This is at least the fourth time since my Dad died last year. On all occasions Mum has actually come face to face with the scumbags. Today one of them met her in the kitchen as they came through the house having broken in through a bedroom window (I say house, she lives in a bungalow) They muttered something, turned round and went back to one of the bedrooms. Mum uses a walking frame so by the time she got there they had scarpered through the window, but not before ransacking 3 bedrooms and taking among other things a solid silver bangle which my grandparents gave to Mum on her 16th birthday. The police have been called again, and fortunately have caught a part image on cameras installed the last time she was burgled (They took her handbag which fortunately had nothing of value in it) and have been very good. Mine and my brother's dilemma is what to do for the best for Mum. She will not move to a warden assisted or sheltered accommodation, she would die within a week she tells me, because Dad built their bungalow and it is her life. I understand that, but neither will Mum have the windows replaced with PVC double glazed ones (hers are old rotting wooden frames) as it will cost too much (She can afford it, we look after her finances. I realise we will probably end up over riding her wishes here because at the end of the day we are wondering if the next time she has intruders, and they probably know she is a soft target, she will get hurt. We do not neglect our Mum, but she will not let us help either. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ayupmeducks 1,730 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 Burglary is a death sentence where I live, break into someones house while they are there and expect lead poisoning. Might be why we have a low crime rate locally. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DaveN 1,118 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 As you say she can afford double glazing could you maybe persuade her by pointing out the money she'll save by cutting down heating costs and maybe the noise (if she's in a noisy area). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
benjamin1945 16,191 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 I really do feel for you darkazana' i had similar worries with my Dad a few years ago,fortunately he did'nt have the breakins,but he was in less than good health,he was so proud and stubborn,and i could understand his feelings. We eventually got him to move in with us and we had some really happy times,despite his worsening health,and i am forever indebted to my lovely wife who cared for him in every way,everyones circumstances are different and its hard work physically and mentally,i'm sure with your love and understanding you will find a solution that suits you all. 7 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
catfan 14,793 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 Aquire her a fericious pet dog, seriously it will be company for your mum as well. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MelissaJKelly 2,124 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 That is so awful your poor Mother. I hope this gets sorted out asap for everyone's sake Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Pianoman 1,535 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 Got to agree with Catfan. Large dog with loud bark that at least looks unfriendly. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Michael Booth 7,364 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 My Mum also lived in a bungalow, about 100 yards from where my sister lives. Because of this there was never any reason for her to leave her home when she became ill. Luckily, there was never a problem with her safety but she did have a panic button device to press in cases of emergency. I wonder if something like this would help your Mum, darkazana. I can understand your Mum not wanting to leave her home. Her husband built the bungalow for them to spend their lives in and I'm sure she feels she'd be letting him down if she gave it up. Regarding security, has she got burglar alarms fitted?. You can get alarms fitted that alert the police directly. Getting a large dog is hardly ideal for a lady who has to use a walking frame. What makes me so angry is that your Mums ordeal can really affect her health and set her back mentally but the burgulars, if they're ever caught, will only receive a slap on the wrist. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
LizzieM 9,514 Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 Sorry to hear of your plight Darkazana, 4 break-ins in a year must be very distressing for your dear old Mum. I know my Dad could not have coped with such trauma. He never locked his door until he went to bed, even in winter when it got dark at about 4pm. I eventually persuaded him to keep the doors locked at all times and we had to use a key to get in. He was housebound and could only move about with a Zimmer frame, if someone got into his house he could have done nothing at all about it. He had a buzzer thing round his neck but never ever used it, I think he was frightened to. These dreadful people have no thought for elderly vunerable folk and sadly such events are likely to kill the victims due to shock and fear. I truly hope you can persuade your Mum to fork out on extra security and better windows, they don't like spending money though do they?!! Good luck. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darkazana 1,736 Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Thanks everyone for your concern and recommendations. Mum used to have a dog, but now looking after one would be too much for her (I did suggest it last night, but know it's too much for her now) She is very stubborn and doesn't show her feelings, and will confront these gits when they come into her home, it really worries me that one day someone will clobber her. We suggested she come to live us on many occasion. We would give up our job and convert the garage on our bungalow into a granny flat for her, but no, Mum is insistent that she wants to stay in her own home, and to be fair although she has to use the zimmer frame she can get about and look after herself well, and is of sound mind so the decision has to be hers. She refuses a panic button or SOS pendant! (John's dad had a pendant and used to leave it in his bedroom so couldn't reach it when he did have a fall). I am sure we will get all the windows done, but sadly that won't stop her forgetting to lock the back door...that was how they got in a month ago! The bungalow is fairly isolated with lots of trees around and quite overgrown, so hidden from view. No she won't allow us to trim much back either, which doesn't help as the couple of neighbours she has can't see if anything is happening. The police make recommendations but cannot force her to improve her security, but one thing I have seen which I think I may install is an alarm which detects movement in the garden (as long as cats etc don't set it off) Hopefully the sound might be enough to deter them from trying to get in the house. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
... 1,411 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Namby pamby laws and protection for vulnerable people do not mix,until proper deterents are introduced cowardice scum will continue to think they can do as they wish,some of these tow rags would and do rob their own grand mothers.unfortunately they pass their morals onto their kids ,what a future for us all.#2 might one day be the only answer here also,but I hope not,leaving Europe and their stupid laws might help. Might I suggest a billboard in the middle of town with the name and addresses of people caught robbing and terrorising elderly and vulnerable people,with a legal invitation for anyone to enter their home uninvited anytime night or day through door or Windows open or not,I can't see a problem with this as they seem to think this behaviour is acceptable,and this would meet equal opps rules Seems wrong somehow that victims lose there valuables and then are expected to pay for security,why can't seizure from the assets of the towrags pay when they are caught,regularly checking their assets,hassling them before they hassle others. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tomlinson 879 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Is your mother fond of dogs, or perhaps leopards? It seems these days that the best thing would be to take the law into your own hands, but I expect that would be illegal. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DAVIDW 1,690 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Terrible what these low lifes put the elderly through . To be honest I doubt having plastic windows will make much difference , if they want to get in they will find a way . Feel for you Darkazana . My mum and dad were never quite the same after a break-in at their home and that happened whilst they were out . I know she is attached to the bungalow but try and persuade her to look at a McCarthy and Stone appartment if there is one nearby . At the moment at my age I admit , doesnt appeal to me yet but those that I know a bit older than me that have moved in absolutely love it there . No gardens or maintenance to worry about, cosy and warm and help there if needed . My pal is dying to move into one but his wife is too young ! He is 74 but married a 52 year old so will have to wait 3 years before she is eligible to live there . Serve him right ! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bilbraborn 1,594 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 I am not a violent person by nature, but a good flogging would be too good for these scum if they are caught. Cheap and easy to administer. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
benjamin1945 16,191 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 When my Dads shed was 'Burgled' on the 'Old Bestwood estate' in the 90s,a certain notorious gang found out,and they administered their own punishment to the culprits,it took the form of all goods being returned with a grovelling apology, And i think a severe telling off.......or may have been a bit harsher........ 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
LizzieM 9,514 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Mmmm ........ I suppose it was always best to have that lot on your side! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
NewBasfordlad 3,599 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 #15 Knowing them as I do I would say a damn sight harsher. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
FLY2 10,109 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Vigilantes always the best way ! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Michael Booth 7,364 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 Tut tut tut, people. Are you all out of your minds?. Have you forgotten about the criminals HUMAN RIGHTS..!!! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
StephenFord 866 Posted October 3, 2014 Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 We haven't forgotten about their human wrongs either. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
darkazana 1,736 Posted October 4, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 4, 2014 Hmmmm I daresay in this crazy world if Mum had hit them with her zimmer frame she would have been done for assault regardless of the fact they shouldn't have been there in the first place! I suppose she gets her spirit from her dad, he always maintained if he caught anyone in his house he would go in for the kill (he used to be a boxer in the navy)! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
... 1,411 Posted October 4, 2014 Report Share Posted October 4, 2014 A man the boxed in the navy ,and a tow rag that frightens old people,if I had done that in my teens down the meddas they would be queuing to kick my arse.the boxer would have fought for the cowardice tow rag to have his freedom. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
benjamin1945 16,191 Posted October 4, 2014 Report Share Posted October 4, 2014 I was Burgled once many years ago,and i was in such a rage the next day i went to the 'Gun shop' on Denman st and purchased the most high powered Gun the law allowed without a licence,looking back it was quite funny now, I had to answer questions to the assistant in the shop who was filling a form in that i had to sign,one question was,..why do you want this weapon?....my honest reply was.........i want to shoot someone!!..............he looked at me and said.......don't f,,k about mate i can't put that. He eventually put summat else,but thats how i honestly felt. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
carni 10,094 Posted October 4, 2014 Report Share Posted October 4, 2014 I had an elderly aunt who lived on Green Lane Clifton. One day, she was talked into having her hedge cut by a (Very Nice Man) driving a small white lorry, That was her description of him. At some point he knocked her door and explained that he was sorry but the job was bigger than expected and would cost more. She left him at the door and went upstairs to her well hidden money. In the wardrobe of course! When she turnd round he was behind her. He took the purse from her and helped himself to the contents. I can't remember how much, but I know it was been between 5/7 thousand pounds. He didn't hurt her but thankfully she was just stunned at what was happening that she didn't protest. She was about 4ft 10inch and probably about 6stone maximum. From then on she carried on putting her money in the same place, but turned the wardrobe key and locked it! So trusting it never entered her head that one tug and the door would open. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
FLY2 10,109 Posted October 4, 2014 Report Share Posted October 4, 2014 She was extremely lucky. I was once on the jury of a murder case whereby three blokes beat an old lady to death for about £40. The photos shown to the jury were horrendous. All three got 25 yrs. they should have hung ! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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