On being old

[alisoncc 379]

The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.

Old Age, I decided, is a gift.

I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon?

I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60&70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day. (If I feel like it)

[Trevor S 2,003]

alisoncc, my Aunt Jean is now 86 years young and often expresses similar sentiments to those that you have written.

She is also of the opinion that she is old enough to do what she wants, when she wants, regardless of what others may think or say.

Getting a bit hard of hearing and a little forgetful but, basically, still as sharp as a tack.

I just hope that I am as good as her if I reach 86!

[mick2me 3,033]

Alison

Your reply should have been along the lines of, "Oh pretty good, how about you"

For to younger people they were also old

Thanks for the wonderful post, one of the best here.

[Bubblewrap 3,815]

I just remembered this.

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Jenny Joseph

[carni 10,094]

Alisoncc

Thank you so much for your post #1, Every thing you have written is exactly how i feel about every thing, you have given me a really happy start to the day,you could believe it is my life you have spoken about, i am sure many others will feel the same. Getting older is as you say a gift, so many people are denied and we lucky ones will all have witnessed this through our lives.I feel so cheerful now, after reading your post, i was going to have a lay in, but i have to get up and look in the mirror and say good morning to that older women and dance around my kitchen, with a smile on my face. Thank you so much Alisoncc.

[jackson 301]

Beautiful piece of prose Alison.

At the wonderful age of 66, I can truly say that I have never felt so happy and free...................................

To me, one of the benefits of living in this great technological age is: 'You Tube', where I can re-live the fabulous music of the 50's, 60's, 70's; my fave at the moment is 'The Lovin' Spoonful' - last week it was David Bowie.

Had a great day yesterday: I varnished my hall floor and sang along and danced along to 'Radio Gold'; was still whistling and singing when I went out of doors to finish varnishing the table and garden chair. I did have a split second thought, wondering what the neighbours would think with the radio blasting and me singing my head off but then I thought: 'So What!" - I only do it once in a while.

PS: I've plans for the future and determined to make my dream come true..........................

[jackson 301]

Hi Bubblewrap, funny you should put on a poem with the beginning line: 'When I am an old woman I shall wear purple"; because last night in bed - before dropping off - I thought about the purple, velvet jacket I have hanging in my wardrobe which I've never worn. I decided that I'd take it out today, see if it fits and if it does then I'd start wearing it - so here's hoping.

PS: It doesn't matter that I'm not going anywhere special, I'm going to get to know the jacket and as with most of my clothes get to love it.

[tomlinson 879]

One good thing I have found about getting old is the humour of it all. The realisation that the 'machine' is running down and finding the results ironic and at times comical! Another is the ability to savour the enjoyable and rewarding past and linger over the pleasurable present. The one sad thing? In the world today, not wishing to be young again.

[Cliff Ton 10,475]

So to sum it up.....as you get older you can do whatever you want, whenever you want, with whoever you want, as often as you want, wherever you want.

Not a bad way of carrying on really.

[alisoncc 379]

Thanks people for all your kind words. Incidently I do have a definition for being old. You are only old when you use your age as an excuse for not doing something.

[colly0410 1,181]

When young uns ask if I mind getting old I always say "it's better than the alternative."

[loppylugs 8,429]

Great thread to start the day. I find myself in agreement with all who have posted. I will be 69 in November, but I refuse to slow down and I plan to keep learning as long as I can. Remember we have the advantage of being able to tell the younger set, you've only been young, I've been young and old both!

[Commo 1,292]

I'll let you know how I feel about getting old when I get there !!

[mick2me 3,033]

Easy people!, I've just had to install a new 'Like This' button

[FLY2 10,109]

Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is voluntary

[Beachbum 68]

My present wife often says that I'm 65 going on 13, I bought myself a fantastic pair of yellow and white striped trainers online last week, much admired, two 'young' people even asked where I got them.

[mudgie49 401]

I wish the 'grown ups' would leave me alone.

[darkazana 1,736]

#4 my mum personified! Love this poem, I bought the book of it for my mum several years ago.

Old is a state of mind I find. I feel as young in my mind as I did in my 20's, but with added wisdom, sadly my body doesn't have the same opinion and sometimes refuses to do what I would like it to do...like cartwheels!!!!

At the campsite we get octogenarians turning up in their caravans full of joie de vivre, a pleasure to meet.

[Paulus 541]

For my view on getting old, see the caption attached to my posts...........................

However much we all wallow & mainly enjoy nostalgia, it's not always about regretting what's past, it's more about us now understanding the values & morals instilled in us from childhood.

I don't regret what I missed out on, compared to todays youngsters, I merely thank the Lord that I had such a wonderful upbringing,I have made many friends, another true blessing , and in the main I've had the blessed sense to avoid those that meant to harm me, or mine.

Paulus

"Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.”

[mick2me 3,033]

Paulus uses the correct terminology

"Do not regret growing older... (Not Old)

I've been doing it all my life.

[colly0410 1,181]

When I was at work Blurred Lines by Robin Thicke (a modern pop song) came on the radio, I said "I can do the line dance to this!" they said "show us then" so I did. I got a round of applause off them, the oldest of them was about 23. Boy I felt good.. :)

[Ayupmeducks 1,730]

As I get older all the injuries I had at work are coming back and haunting me.... The mind might still be 21, but the old body feels likes its 200 years old.....

[Compo 10,328]

I'm getting fed up with the old man who is squatting in my mirror. I saw the sod again this morning when I was having a wash. The cheeky sod was also having a wash! I wish I could find a way to evict him!

[poohbear 1,360]

They forget when pension ages are increased...folks might live longer,but arthritis and the rest still appear as the body ages.The people telling us plebs how long we are to work spend their working lives just gobbing ...nothing physical.

The thought of 68 year olds still working down the sewers or digging holes in the road is obscene.It's ok for the chair jockeys.

[Rob.L 1,090]

Interesting that the decision to increase the age we get our pensions was made by people who get 12 weeks holiday a year, and a pension as soon as they get kicked out of office.

As it is, I've been pondering of late. In the 41 years since I left school, the longest I've been away from work is when I took a three-week holiday in 1988. Yet my chance of actually retiring in the next ten years is rapidly diminishing as prices rise faster than wages or pensions..