Albert Brown !


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Two things my mum warned me about were Albert (who I saw regularly going around town), and the "ladies" in Yates's or the Flying Horse.

She even said that the reason there was chalk on the floor downstairs in Yates's was that they used to chalk their prices on the sole of their shoes, so that they could scrub it off on the wooden floor should the law come through the door.

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To save blushes, a name has been tweaked …… In my younger days, I had the immense pleasure to be the object of the affections of a stunning young lady, whose parents ran several chip shops around

Bugger me!...on second thoughts!!

The reason that Albert Brown was so famous is because homosexuality wasn't so in your face in those days. Maybe I should have put that in a different way. lol. If you were gay you'd keep it a secret,

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One thing though, Albert Brown was a really nice bloke. He was accepted for what he was,sadly, over the years was imprisoned for being homosexual. Unlike some of this lot today who think they are gay

homosexual only because in some circles it is considered fashionable.

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He used to drink in The Napier on Union Rd and as kids we knew that there was "something very different" about him just by his appearance and demeanour,but at that age in those days had no idea about his proclivities, only that the grown ups used to smile between themselves and pass knowing winks when he was mentioned in our hearing.

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By all accounts he was the life and soul of any bar-room. I don't think anyone disliked him. I remember him in his powder-blue suit, blonde hair and a very pock-marked face.

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I remember Albert sometimes used to walk down Queens Drive - he came into our shop a couple of times. There was another chap lived in the bedsits on Queens Drive who openly dressed as a woman, I remember the long false eyelashes or 'roadsweepers'. He was a regular in our shop as mum used to let him have 'tick' and used to fascinate us kids,.

I'm sure Albert had a big funeral and the procession went down St Anns Well Road?

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Nowt wrong we Albert, he was what he was. Nobody seems to mention how many lesbos there were about. I saw few around St Annes, Union Rd area and always one of them dressed more or less as a bloke. Anyway who cares.

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Shop owned by Albert Brown in Bulwell in the 1970's

It says "The shop next door was Alma's Ladies hairdressers, having previously been run as a Ladies Hairdressers by a well known flambouyant Nottingham character, Albert Brown"

That's a polite description :)

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  • 2 years later...

I never knew Albert Brown personally but he was well known in town and i am fairly sure who he was.He used to attend the Market Square on Sunday afternoons especially which ,as we will all recall, was Nottingham's 'Hyde Park Corner', a hotbed of debate, political meetings ,club meetings etc.

Albert ,if i have the right person, was about 50 in the sixties at a guess; i believe he was bald but he wore a short ,blonde wig and a leather trilby; he was a very,strange person and i am fairly sure he was gay ( although that word wasn't used at the time); he used to wear a white mac most of the time and listening to him from a distance ,i think he loved his drink too much.

Our headmaster at High Pavement school was Mr.M.H.Brown and the boys used to nickname him 'Albert' as an insult. That sums up poor Albert Brown's  sad reputation. He probably did live in the Meadows  and that will be why he was in town drinking most days.

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I use to see him a lot in town. One day my brother had been for a drink with his mates and had come home when he mentioned to dad that he'd seen Albert Brown. My dad went berserk and told him to stay away from him. Dad was a policeman and probably knew what most Notts people didnt. By the way it was a wig he wore ( mostly at a jaunty angle) It looked more like a mop than a wig.

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My memory of him dates to the early 70's. At about closing time he came running out of the Bell in a panic shouting "I'm bostin' fur a waz"* and ran over to the underground latrines over at Slab Square (which, I understand, are now gone). Apparently he'd been making a nuisance of himself in the toilets of the Bell and they threw him out without him being able to relieve himself.

 

*Tr to English: I urgently need to urinate.

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It's only the 'done thing' now by disgusting morons. Decent people wouldn't dream of doing such a thing.

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  • 1 month later...

To save blushes, a name has been tweaked ……

In my younger days, I had the immense pleasure to be the object of the affections of a stunning young lady, whose parents ran several chip shops around the city. The smallest ( yet strangely. the busiest, )  was on Bunbury Street , very close to the  Bathley Streeet junction . On Bathley dwelt a flamboyant character we shall name Marmaduke, ( guess who ) , who was one of the regular clientele. 

I distinctly recall our first encounter....

" Well helleeeew honky tonk !...... cooed Marmaduke.

" Whah ?...……...stammered yours truly

" My, you're a big boy and no mistake …….he trilled.

I stared  aghast at this bizarre apparition, mostly transfixed by the chiffon scarf wrapped tightly round his scraggy neck.

Behind Marmaduke in the queue for chips was another regular  named Baz,  an immense council workman, who had to come through the chip shop door sideways.

" Lerrim alone Marmaduke " he grunted, " he dunt look like a wuftah to me..!. ( No PC in those days ).

I was hastily bundled into the back room by the delectable girlfriend who laughingly informed me , " It's alright ,  he's only like that when  he's pissed " ……(apparently a not infrequent event.)

Later that evening I was leaning on a pillar outside Lyons ,waiting for the Arnold bus, when I spied Marmaduke mincing across Slab Square directly towards me, his purple bootees flashing in the twllight.

Fortunately the No. 69 wheezed to a halt at that moment and I leapt aboard. As the bus pulled away he looked up, gave a quick wave , and I swear, blew  me a kiss !!

In a state of deep paranoia I spent the next few days talking in a deep bass voice, taking extra long strides, and frantically checking my shirt  tails weren't hanging out.

Our paths crossed quite often at the shop, and I gradually realised he was a rather sad , sometimes amusing, harmless old buffer. (or should that be  harmless old bugger ! )

He excelled himself very late on one very warm sultry summer night, when having picked up the gorgeous lass from the shop, I stopped my newly acquired motor at a secluded lonely spot on the Embankment. As we were engaged in a torrid passionate clinch, a leering face topped by an unmistakeable orange hued coiffeur burst through the half open window. looked me straight in the eye, and warbled " Oooooh….you are a tease !!!

The beauty emitted a tooth rattling scream as I crashed through the drivers door and promptly nose dived into the duck muck.... due to my bellbottoms falling round my ankles...(belt came loose, don't know why). I staggered to my feet just in time to see a familiar little white mac disappearing into the War Memorial gardens.

Plodding back to the car I was distraught to find the object of my carnal desires convulsed with mirth..engulfed in shuddering waves of laughter...at my bedraggled appearance, thereby ruling out any further steamy activity.

The moment, like Marmaduke, had gone.

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  • 5 months later...
11 hours ago, Alpha said:

I remember seeing him near the Flying Horse (Canning Circus),londish homosexual with a blotchy complexion. Walked with a bit of an effected swagger I recall.

That's because he had a sore arse. 

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